Santa wears a lot of mascara...

I work at a special needs school every once and a while, and the last time I was there, they had me dress up as Santa Clause and sing songs with the kids. One of the other teachers made a sleigh on wheels himself, and dressed up like Rudolph to pull me around. It was awesome.

So basically this is what I would look like if I inexplicably became an old man, but retained my love of eye makeup.